My nightmares usually consist of post apocalyptic times always with a lot of running and fighting. Sometimes hostage situations of just myself, sometimes loved ones or a combination. Last night, I was surrounded by people who care about me. No matter what I said or did no one could hear me and though it felt …
Suffocating and Surviving
Maybe I don't know who I am or what I'm doing but I am trying to figure it all out. I lost a part of myself I was told I wasn't allowed to be, leaving me hollow chasing a feeling I couldn't imagine to be real. A life I never felt I deserved. I fantasized …
I’m Tired
I don't remember the last time when I spoke the words "I'm tired," and that was all I meant. Whether it was to someone or to myself. I'm tired has replaced I'm okay, I'm all right, I'm fine which often was retorted with, "Are you sure?" Sometimes followed with unsolicited advice which honestly was never …
When nightmares feel all to real
Most of my nightmares consist of me running, forever it seems. Being chased or chasing someone or something. Thankfully in my dreams I have stamina and the endurance to keep running. I often wake up with my legs feeling sore at times. I also tend to get into these grand battles, always fighting. Winning some, …
Cinderella isn’t Dressed in Yellow, She’s Dressed in Black and She’s Depressed
Cinderella isn't dressed in yellow. She's dressed in black. And she's depressed, in pain, ill and exhausted but still getting the damn job done. She's on mood stabilizers that don't help nearly as much now that she quit smoking cigarettes. She doesn't live with step relatives but blood and her dad isn't dead but he's …
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This is what depression looks like
This is what depression looks like: This is what depression feels like (to me anyway.) It's more than the really bad days of not being able to get out of bed. The idea of getting out of bed is exhausting. Not showering for days on end and not giving a rat's ass about it. Not …
From my personal journal during a bipolar episode
I'm sharing this again because for me, it's important to share my struggles. In hopes that other's will see there is still reason for hope. I still have bad days. Hard days. Now, my good days are filled with so much love and joy and kindness, it truly makes these bad days easier to survive. …
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You are not alone. I am not alone.
The truth. Something we all seek yet sometimes it's more than we can bare. Here's my truth, or I should say, truths. I am 31 years old. I'm a single mother of an amazing little boy. I have a strong support system so that I can go out into the world and do the things …
Ramblings from an Unusual Mind
Ramblings from an Unusual Mind,Is my new book, it releases for kindle on May 7th, 2015. It is now available for pre-order. Can't wait that long? The paperback is currently available via amazon.com and if you can swing, I recommend the paperback as the images in color are much more pleasing to the eye. The …
Endure. Survive. Endure.
I looked at the ground, my heart broke. It took a deep breath in and tried to retain all the pieces it seemed to be in now. It didn't. It couldn't but be damned it still tried. Sometimes in life you are sitting still as the world rushes by you. Others, you don't have enough …