Dreams can be crazy little portals into what the hell is going on in your brain. I just wish I could feel rested the next day instead of exhausted as if I physically endured what unfolded in my mind. It was a wild ride last night and honestly, I'm not sure how I feel about …
When nightmares feel all to real
Most of my nightmares consist of me running, forever it seems. Being chased or chasing someone or something. Thankfully in my dreams I have stamina and the endurance to keep running. I often wake up with my legs feeling sore at times. I also tend to get into these grand battles, always fighting. Winning some, …
Today was a hard day
Today was a hard day. Days similar to today have tried to break me and sometimes I think where I find my strength is keeping it all deep inside of me wrapped up tightly with all the other things I bury for the sake of others. I often write about how being bipolar feels to …
Words and stuff
Poetry from my past often shows me I am still the same person dealing with the same things. As someone with Bipolar Disorder has to. With how much the people in my life have changed over the years I wonder why not me? Do I know who am I? Is this why I am so …
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Cinderella isn’t Dressed in Yellow, She’s Dressed in Black and She’s Depressed
Cinderella isn't dressed in yellow. She's dressed in black. And she's depressed, in pain, ill and exhausted but still getting the damn job done. She's on mood stabilizers that don't help nearly as much now that she quit smoking cigarettes. She doesn't live with step relatives but blood and her dad isn't dead but he's …
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This is what depression looks like
This is what depression looks like: This is what depression feels like (to me anyway.) It's more than the really bad days of not being able to get out of bed. The idea of getting out of bed is exhausting. Not showering for days on end and not giving a rat's ass about it. Not …
From my personal journal during a bipolar episode
I'm sharing this again because for me, it's important to share my struggles. In hopes that other's will see there is still reason for hope. I still have bad days. Hard days. Now, my good days are filled with so much love and joy and kindness, it truly makes these bad days easier to survive. …
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Win a copy of my book to celebrate the 4 year anniversary of my first novel, Finding Alice!
Win a copy of my book to celebrate the 4 year anniversary of my first novel, Finding Alice!I can't believe it has been 4 years since I first published Finding Alice! In a few short months the original first edition of Finding Alice will be pulled from the shelves and replaced with the newly edited …
Surviving with a Bipolar disorder diagnosis
Surviving with a Bipolar disorder diagnosis I am not my illness. No matter how many disorders they slap on my chart, they do not define me. They do not own me. I can only take care of myself the best I can and hope for a little compassion on days it's hard to get out …
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